I’m always right.
OK, not ALWAYS right. Sometimes I’ll do a maths sum without a calculator, which to be honest is quite foolish with my numerical history. But let’s just gloss over that one. It depresses me that I’ve made it to 31 still unable to do percentages without a website to help me.
Trust your instincts people, they’ll usually serve you right.
And my instincts served me right in this scenario, as I’m about to elaborate.
Made in Chelsea stars Binky and JP announced their pregnancy at the start of this year. They’d had quite the rocky relationship prior to conception (I hate that word), which of course was all played out on the E4 Reality TV show for us all to comment and pass judgment on.
You may recall (if you don’t, then why not?) that I wrote an article a couple of months ago explaining how I think the ‘Celebrity Mother & Baby’ industry is quite a lucrative one. If you’ve amassed numerous followers across your social media platforms then you can look forward to magazine interviews, products to #spon and even the chance of your very own TV show documenting the highs and lows of your journey into parenthood.
Step forward Alexandra ‘Binky’ Felstead and Josh Patterson. It’s your turn on the small screen.
I’ll be honest. I wasn’t exactly looking forward to settling down to watch this programme. It didn’t give me the anticipation and excitement I feel at the start of every episode of Love Island; put it that way.
In February 2016 I watched The Baby Diaries, a TV programme following Sam Faiers (she of TOWIE fame) as she and her partner the infamous Paul (for all the wrong reasons) looked forward to the birth of their baby. It caused quite the furore. Namely because Paul and his Mother shared a kiss that arguably went on for longer than some thought necessary. I wrote an article about that too, it went “semi viral”, giving me some of my best traffic I’d ever had at that point. So, thanks Paul for giving your Mother a peck.
Anyway, I’m digressing. You’re here for my verdict on Born in Chelsea and I’m waffling on about Sam Faiers and her
rather boring programme. You want posh and who am I to step in the way of that.
For me, Born In Chelsea wasn’t exactly ground-breaking. It did what it said on the tin. It gave us “exclusive” access to Made in Chelsea’s Binky and JP and their journey into parenthood.
However, it actually changed my opinion on JP.
I’ve always held something of a harsh opinion on JP. Thanks to MIC, I thought he was controlling, boring and quite annoying. Born in Chelsea actually left me feeling like he actually was quite a decent bloke. Who knew?
Watching JP and Binky babysit Binky’s little goddaughter actually made my usually cynical, cold heart warm slightly. Whereas with The Baby/Mummy Diaries with Sam Faiers and Paul we often see that Paul doesn’t exactly take a hands on approach. JP couldn’t have been more different. Maybe he was told to be like that; following the raft of criticism Paul came in for off the back of his series’ but I was pleasantly surprised.
Talking of surprises, I raised more than 1 eyebrow at Binky’s announcement that JP was to “cut the coil” once she’d given birth to Baby Binks. She meant the cord, obvs. Oh the hilarity.
The episode was mainly spent toing and froing from Binky’s soon to be completed house with her checking up on the progress of said gaff. Was it going to be ready in time for Baby Binks? Was she going to get her nursery completed? Would she ever have an oven? The answer was almost a no, but predictably the house was soon finished to her standard. Even if I again raised an eyebrow at each of the individually boxed and wrapped pristine vests and baby gros. My love, take it from me, they will not stay that pristine for much longer. Cherish it. Nothing will ever be pristine again. You cannot have nice things when you have kids and/or animals; it’s a universal fact of life.
Mama Binks was on hand to offer her usual pearls of wisdom. I do love that woman. Binky has the loveliest Mum ever. I want her to adopt me and we visit the Bluebird in Chelsea and get shit faced on actual real champagne instead of Sainers Prosecco like I’ve become accustomed with.
The Lindo Wing at St Mary’s Hospital was the choice of birthplace for Our Binks. Where previously birthed babies have included little known Prince George and Princess Charlotte, their father Prince William and Uncle Harry. Amongst good company I’m sure you’ll agree.
Born in Chelsea, was a nice programme. Full of nice things. Nothing dramatic happened, aside from me discovering I like JP, which was quite the revelation. Congrats Binks and JP, welcome to the world of parenthood. But take it from me Binky, my arms still wobble nearly 4 years on, so don’t get your hopes up too much.
And as for my broody levels. They peaked during the last 10 minutes of the programme, but have now returned to normal altitudes. Much to the relief of my other half.